Some people are better communicators than others. Communication is something we all need to learn and improve on, because it’s an essential part of any healthy relationship.
Communication is very complex. We may hear things incorrectly, or misinterpret the message.
It is important when communicating with your partner that you:
It is also important that your partner:
Misunderstandings can occur at any stage and this may lead to hurt, confusion or anger. It is important to guard against distortion and make sure that your message is heard by your partner without them feeling attacked.
Communicating isn’t just about words – your tone of voice, facial expressions, body language or even your silence communicate as much, if not more, than the words spoken.
‘I have to work away from home a lot and one night my partner started crying saying I was not at home enough. I responded ‘What would you like me to do? I am prepared to leave my job but it’s going to be hard to find another one.’ She replied ‘I don’t want you to do anything! I just want you to listen and hear what I’m saying!’ As a guy I tend to jump to trying to find a solution. It’s easy to forget that listening is often the best place to start.’ Barry, 35
This article and many more can be found in the "Renovate your relationship" booklet